I’ve decided to start focusing on myself more. Making myself the best version of me. I talk about this A LOT, but it seems as though I don’t do much to get there. I know many things I should be doing: yoga, meditating, going to church, etc. I’ve read tons of books on the key to happiness and finding yourself, but I continue to stay stuck, expecting a change without changing anything. I’m pretty sure they say this is the definition of insanity.
The problem is, though, that I’m scared to work on myself. Scared of what I might find out or that something I’m doing won’t match what I decide I want. I avoid writing, because I’m scared of what I might “say.” (This is obviously strange, unhealthy, and not normal, but I think the first step is noticing this.)
So, I’m starting small. I’m trying to think about what I want, and I’ve decided that I want to be the type of person who makes an amazing breakfast (eggs specifically) and a really good steak. (I realize I’m not getting too deep here, but I’m just getting my feet wet with the whole figuring myself out thing.)
I want people to wake up at my house and pray I’m cooking in the morning. Sure, I’ve made eggs before, but they aren’t overly exceptional. As far as the steak goes, I just think it would be cool to be able to cook an amazing steak.
In my quest to find myself, I’m declaring tomorrow my first egg cooking day. I even have a whole carton in case I mess up. Today I’m devoting to my online search for the perfect way to cook scrambled eggs (clearly I’m on spring break, or I wouldn’t have time to think about this).
I’m declaring it now – by 2016, I will make an amazing breakfast and steak dinner! If you are hungry, please don’t come by for food before then. 🙂
There is obviously more to face than just my cooking, but I have to start somewhere.